6/9/2023 0 Comments Mymind wont shut the fuck upSelect a specific example that illustrates the behavior or situation you want to change – It’s a good idea to have 2 or 3 examples. ![]() Make sure you are clear that it isn’t personal, and that you want her to be successful and will support her in changing her behavior. Name the Issue – She simply talks too much, shares too much personal information, and goes on sharing long past the point where people are interested.I am a big fan of Susan Scott’s process outlined in her book Fierce Conversations. Consider supporting yourself with some kind of process. Are you making a suggestion that she change her behavior for her own good, or are you making a non-negotiable request? When people get defensive they have a hard time hearing, so it will be up to you to be brutally honest and crystal clear. This conversation is going to be hard enough without an audience.īefore you go into the conversation, get very clear on your motives for giving the feedback. ![]() Set up a meeting with your chatter box, maybe in another part of the building or at the end of the day. And you may not be able to fix the situation. It will require all of your courage, patience, and kindness. This is one of those extremely difficult personal things you have to deal with as a manager. I think you need to go at it head on-don’t soft-pedal or pull any punches. I am sorry for you because you are the one who’s going to have to either do something or risk losing the respect of your team. She might be going through some kind of personal crisis that has thrown her off balance, or perhaps she has always been this way and no one has ever told her she needs to cut it out. Generally, people who are that oblivious to social cues are in the grip of some huge need that they are not able to get met. Most of all, I am sorry for your chatty employee. ![]() She gets her job done, but she is driving us all nuts and every single person on my team looks at me pleadingly with “do something” in their eyes. She can’t just answer a question-she has to give the whole back story, going back to how a customer reminds her of her second grade teacher. I try to have regular one on ones with her, but I can’t seem to get them done unless I have an hour and half. We all know more about her parents, her siblings, her cat, and the guy who just apparently dumped her (we all know why!) than we want to.Īnyone within earshot cringes when she starts talking-and that is a lot of people.Įveryone avoids her now, including me. You can’t ask her how she is because she will stop and tell you in exhaustive detail. She interviewed well and had great references, but now that she is settled in she never shuts up and we are all going insane. I manage a large team and I recently hired a new team member. I work in an open environment type of setting, and for the most part it works.
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